What I Think About Mother’s Day

🌷
I have always set goals. Had aspirations. Wanted things in life.
I wanted a higher degree so I got my Master’s in Education.
I wanted to learn how to design things with the help of a computer so I took graphic design classes.
Lots of big goals and little goals all along the way.

I also wanted to be a mother.

We tried artificial insemination many times.
Never worked.
Then Jason was in a car accident and spent 13 months in the hospital and years of recovery.
Sixteen years after we were married we tried IVF and on the second round, it worked. 

But there were 16 Mother’s Days before that.
16 chances to long for a child and not have one.
16 days at church where a flower or chocolates were awkwardly pressed into my hand because I was an “other mother.”
16 years to convince myself that I was still worthy and enough and complete - without being a mother.

I know Mother’s Day might not be the greatest for you either.
Maybe you feel like you don’t measure up.
Or your child is choosing something different than you planned and you wonder where you went wrong.
Or you’re tired or overwhelmed or you’re not sure you even LiKE being a mom.
Or you haven’t had the chance for motherhood.

I hear you.
Mother’s Day can be filled with lots of emotion. Maybe joy. Perhaps love. Possibly contentment. But there also might be some  pain and disappointment and resentment. Or bitterness, exhaustion and discouragement.

I hear you. I see you.
I love you.
I love me.
And I love all you women out there.
Every. Single. Beautiful. One of you.
You are valuable.
You are whole.
You are astounding.
Just as you are.

Maybe you’ll let yourself remember this message if the weekend feels a little too much for you:
I love you.
You are perfect.
Happy Mother’s Day.💙✊🏻