This Letter

💌
I’m in an awkward stage.
I get wedding announcements addressed just to me.

Kolette Hall
my address

And every time I see my name, by itself, it jolts me.
I pause for a moment and wonder why they didn’t write Jason’s name, too.

Then I remember.
He’s gone for a while.
No wait, he’s gone forever.

It used to be “Jason&Kolette.”
We were our own word.
Together.
Now it’s just me.

Of course they didn’t write his name on the envelope.
They did exactly what makes sense in this situation. The right thing. The correct thing.

And they probably also paused for that moment, pen in hand, looking at their address list with both of our names on it.

The Hall Family. Jason and Kolette Hall.

They probably had their own jolt to the heart where they missed Jason, too. Memories might have flashed through their mind of happy or funny or special times with Jason. They wanted to write his name but weren’t sure if they should.

It’s this awkward stage.
Where he’s gone.
But not really.
In my mind, we’re still Jason&Kolette.

I sign the card for their wedding gift with both of our names.
Just like I always have.
I think to myself, “Jason loves these people, too. I’m telling them that!”

We’re still Jason&Kolette.
But then, we’re not.

Thanks for this letter.
It’s a thank you note for a wedding gift we sent.
Of course I cried when I flipped through my mail and landed on this.
Of course I did.
And ran my fingers over his name, loving that I was still seeing us together.

Thanks for this letter.💌