🚙
Jason had a Maverick gas rewards number.
Using his phone number, we got a few cents off of our gas price.

After he died, I had to change all of the bills and accounts to just be in my name.
It was terrible, actually.
Not only are you missing your person, but then you have to keep telling others that you’re missing your person.
They’re no longer here
Their name must be removed.
Blotted out.
Deleted.
Account updated.

Sometimes they had to have the death certificate sent to them. I had it easily accessible on my phone and computer to quickly email it to whoever required proof that he was actually gone.
Proof that the account should now be in my name. 
Proof that his name should be deleted.

It’s a necessary part of death. 
But it’s terrible.
Maybe you’ve experienced this same thing when the one you love passed away.
Having to update the accounts when you have no desire to update your life without them.

At a certain point, I just stopped updating.
I decided that some things can just have his name. It’s fine.
His Maverick rewards is one of those things.
It’s still his phone number.
It’s still in his name.
I push the buttons to get the reward before I pump the gas.
And remember him.
Every time.

I keep Jason’s number on purpose.
I keep his phone.
Pay for it every month.
I like his stuff on there.
The photos. The contacts. The apps.
I like his number still meaning something.
No update necessary.✊🏻💙