Kolette Hall

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“I feel obligated to…”

😬
You’re not obligated to do things.
I know. You think you are.

You feel obligated to say yes to things that you don’t really want to do.
You feel obligated to show up for family dinner with your parents every Sunday when you’d rather just be at home.
You feel obligated to go along with your client’s idea just to keep them happy.
You feel obligated to sit and play a game with your kids because you’ve been working for the last five hours.

But you’re not obligated.

My friend said she wouldn’t do anything if she didn’t feel obligated to do it.
I pushed back on that.
She has other options.
She feels other emotions.
Obligation might drive a lot of her actions but it doesn’t drive all of them.
She probably also feels capable sometimes.
And compassionate.
And determined.
And helpful.
And motivated.
And kind.

Wouldn’t it be nice to tap into those emotions more often and drop the obligation?
That’s what I asked her.
It’s what I’m asking you, too.

You don’t have to feel obligated.
There are so many other feelings that can drive your actions.
Joyful. Purposeful. Creative. Loving. Dedicated. Brave. Peaceful. Silly. Content. Sympathetic. Courageous. Happy. Generous. Committed. Bold. Hopeful. Grateful. Respectful.
They are all an option.

Obligated is a funny word to me. It looks funny. It sounds funny. And it even feels kind of funny to realize that it isn’t actually true.
You don’t have to feel obligated in order to take action.
You have other choices.💙✊🏻